W is for When am I now?
by VariegatedMosaic
Summary: I somehow managed to land myself in Clan War era of the Naruto world, and from there, I somehow managed to find myself being thrown through time. Always a pleasant thing to experience. Will eventually take up the most time in Naruto/Naruto Shippuden timeline. SI OC. Time-travel. T for possible language/angst/topics that only teenagers and older can really understand.
1. Ch01: Waking Up

**Yay! Another overpowered SI OC! These types of fanfics really are the easiest to write. And they're my favorite to read, actually, so please don't judge. ****Names are in the Asian style, with family name first. And I've decided that making up a title is harder than writing the actual story...**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Naruto or Naruto Shippuden.**

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**Chapter 1: Waking Up**

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**OC's POV**

I woke up to someone poking my face. "Ahhhh, stop it. Leave me alone," I managed to groan out.

The poking persisted, and I raised an arm to cover my face, groaning from the pain present in all the muscles I thought and didn't know I had. The poking then continued on an exposed part of my face.

"Stop it. If I wasn't so sore, I'd be kicking you in the face," I threatened. The poking continued, and I opened my eyes to see a boy with a funny haircut. "Go away."

"You're awake! Who are you? How did you get here? Are you a ninja?" He started jumping up and down excitedly.

"What?" My brain wasn't working. I sat up, rubbing my eyes and yawning. "Alright, chillax, kid. Where the heck am I?"

"You're in the forest."

I took in the trees surrounding us. "Ah." I took a closer look at the kid. If I didn't know better, I'd have thought I was in a dream and the kid was Senju Hashirama. But then again, I was feeling pain. You don't feel pain in dreams.

"Alright, kid, what forest, exactly?"

"This forest." He gestured grandly around him. I snorted and tried to sit up.

"Owww. What the heck happened? I feel like I got used as a punching bag." I sat up and looked around. I was in a pretty forest, next to a stream. _Ah. The famous Hashirama-Madara stone-skipping stream._

"So?" He looked at me expectantly. It took me a bit to remember what he had asked me.

"I don't have a name, I have no idea how I got here, and no, I am not a ninja." After all, I did not have a name that he'd be able to pronounce if he really was _the_ Hashirama.

"Then why were you holding this?" He held up a kunai.

"Huh? Really?" _What in the world was I doing unconscious with a sharp object?_ "So, who are you?"

"I'm Hashirama."

"Ah. Uh, nice to meet you, Hashirama-san. Anyway, is there some way I could get a bath or something? I feel extremely sore and filthy."

"Sure! There's a stream right there!" He pointed over to stone-skipping stream.

I got up slowly and walked over to the stream. For some reason, I felt really, really short. With that foreboding feeling, I looked at my hands. They were really small. Then, I turned my attention to my body. I was flat. I was closer to the ground. I was a kid. I turned to look at Hashirama.

"Hey, how old do I look?"

"Ummm, probably like 3?"

_And you don't find it strange in the slightest that my speaking style isn't that of a three-year-old? Though, I guess it comes with the time-period. _"Huh. Got any spare clothes?"

"Um, I can go get some. Uhhh, if someone my age with black spiky hair and a frown on his face comes here, tell him that I'll be right back, okay? I'll be right back!" He disappeared, leaving me standing next to the stream.

I examined myself after he left. Unluckily, I was still a girl. _I hate having the anatomy of a girl. This means that I have to go through puberty, again. In a world full of ninja._ The first time, my younger sister had taken it upon herself to cause me as much pain as possible by hitting me in the chest non-stop. Of course, she was an ignorant little kid, so she didn't understand why I was in pain. And yes, I was a pushover pacifist. I didn't want to retaliate because I was afraid of injuring them, since I didn't know what I was capable of. I was bigger and stronger than them, but I wasn't about to find out how much I could hurt them.

I was pretty white. I mean, I had been tan before, so this was new. My hair was a long, white tangled mess, and I didn't have a brush, so I took the kunai that Hashirama had left and hacked at my hair. I basically made a ponytail with one hand and hacked off the hair between my hand and my head. I figured that I might as well masquerade as a boy in this place. As I was hacking at my hair, I began talking to myself.

"I have no idea where I am, how I got here, or what to do. My hair is white, I'm apparently three years old, and I don't have a name. What am I, a freaking orphan? For all I know, I'm going to end up being killed in the next week, and my pitiful existence will come to an end. Let's see, what do I like? Light, shiny things, color, happy people, pretty things, food. What do I not like? Pain, hurt, loud things, creeps, being sick. My hobbies? Music, I guess. Making up stories. Learning. My dream? Do I even have one? Maybe to survive. Surviving sounds good. Argh, what am I supposed to do? I'm antisocial, I don't know how to fight, I'm probably a coward, always running from things. Maybe I'm schizophrenic? Last time I checked, I'm squeamish at the sight of blood, and I have low pain tolerance, but that's only from pain caused by siblings. That's really weird. I wonder why they were the only ones who could cause me considerable pain?"

I was so focused on my pity party that I didn't notice someone sneak up behind me and grab me, putting a kunai to my throat.

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**Three guesses on who's holding the kunai. Please review. Danke. ~VM**


	2. Ch02: It's Madara

**And here is the second chapter! I'm not too sure as to whether there will be a pairing, yet...**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Naruto/Naruto Shippuden.**

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**Chapter 2: It's Madara...**

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_A little recap: OC finds herself next to the stone-skipping stream in the Naruto Clan War era. She meets Senju Hashirama who leaves to go get her clothes. After a mini pity party, OC gets caught by a stranger and has a kunai to her neck._

**OC's POV**

"Who are you?" a voice questioned. It was a young voice.

_Ah, great._ I mentally rolled my eyes. "Sorry, I don't have a name."

"Why not?"

"I just don't. Never needed one, I guess." _At least in the less-than-an-hour that I've been in this world._ I tried to shrug.

"Why are you here?"

"No idea." The grip on me got tighter. _Damn. It must be Madara._

"Tell me the truth!"

I sighed. "I really don't know." Then I just decided to go for it. "Um, you wouldn't happen to have black spiky hair and a frown on your face, would you?"

"What is it to you?"

"Uh, well, some kid said he'd get me clothes. He said that I should wait here and explain the situation to his friend. So, uh, are you the friend?"

"Why should I tell you? What was his name?"

"Um, but what if you're not him? I can't tell you his name because I can't even see you."

"Madara!" _Ah, my savior has arrived._ "Madara! What do you think you're doing?"

"This kid was talking to himself and playing with a kunai, here. He looked suspicious."

"Madara! Let him go! I went to go get clothes for him."

Madara let me go, and I fell to the ground.

"Uh, welcome back, Hashi-chan." I decided to call him by a shortened version of his name, since I was supposed to be a three-year-old.

"Are you okay? Madara didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No, I'm fine. Really. Mada-kun was just being an obstinate ass."

Madara glared at me, but then he got an interested glint in his eyes. _Damn, now I'm interesting to an Uchiha. _"Who are you?"

"He doesn't have a name, Madara."

"Huh? Is he a ninja? He didn't act scared when I caught him. His pulse didn't even speed up."

_That was only because I was thinking some pretty pathetic thoughts at that point. _They turned to look at me, and I got tired of their silent staring. "What?"

"Were you not afraid of being caught?" Hashirama asked.

"Uh, well, I mean, if he wanted to kill me, I'd be dead. And at least it would have been quick, right?"

Hashirama looked shocked. "But Shiro-kun! Aren't you afraid of dying?"

"Well, no one would miss me if I died. I'm useless right now, and I don't have a goal at the moment, so it wouldn't matter much anyway."

"But I would miss you!"

"Do you really wish to die?" Madara asked. I could have sworn he glanced at my throat as if he was thinking about ending my life right then and there.

"No. But I'll die when I die. It happens to us all. But if I died like this, it would be pretty pathetic." _Wait._ "Shiro-kun?"

"Yeah! Because your hair is white. But why did you have to cut it?!" Hashirama was wailing in despair over my hair.

My face deadpanned. "Long hair is a pain to maintain. I'm a homeless orphan, Hashi-chan. I don't have the time nor the resources to take care of long hair."

"But it was so pretty!"

I shrugged. "If you're that worried about it, it'll grow back. And what self-respecting guy calls someone's hair pretty?"

"But it was! Now it looks like my brother's hair."

"Yeah, yeah. Thanks for the clothes. I'm gonna go wash up." I grabbed the clothes and found a spot in the stream, hidden by a big rock, to wash up. I quickly shed my clothes and jumped into the cold stream.

"You speak well for a three-year old," Madara's voice came suddenly from behind me, making me jump. Or at least I would have if the water hadn't been so cold.

I was thinking that it was a good thing my body was completely submerged in the water. And that my back was to him.

"Yeah, that's what I thought so, too. I don't really remember much about my past, you know. I just woke up to Hashi-chan poking me in the face, my body too sore to move, and my clothes covered in filth and grime. If I didn't know any better, I would have thought that I'd been living under a rock for all this time. Though that wouldn't explain my speaking skills. Ah well, who cares?"

"You're girly."

"You're not."

"You're weak."

"And once again, you're not. Care to make any more obvious statements?"

"Do you ever get angry?"

"I'm sure I do. Though I have yet to find something that makes me angry. It will probably end up being something completely mundane."

"Are you really three years old?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. Hashi-chan said that I look that age. I'm not going to argue with him because I have yet to see what I look like. Though, I guess you're free to amend his original estimate."

"If I hadn't seen what you look like, I would have guessed that you were our age."

"I'm sure. Now, will you please leave so I can get dressed?" Although I was only three, and I never really had had a shred of modesty, I would have rather not have to reveal that I was a girl. Thankfully, he left, and I dried quickly in the sun and put the clothes on.

I returned to find the boys discussing something. Presumably me.

"Wow, you hair is really white. It'd be a target on a battlefield," Madara drawled.

"Well, at least it's be a smaller target than your head, inflated as it is," I retorted.

"What was that, you little brat? Do you even know who I am?"

"You're Mada-kun, duh. Having memory problems in your ever-increasing age, old man?"

"Hey, guys-"

"Old? You're the one with the blinding white hair. I'm surprised you're not balding."

"Well, you wear diapers since you're too old to hold it in."

"Well, you've never even been potty trained!"

"Guys!"

"WHAT?" both Madara and I simultaneously turned and yelled, causing Hashirama to cower. Gloom settled upon the boy, and he started sulking.

After a bit of startled silence, I asked, "Is that normal behavior for him?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"Look, Hashi-chan! Butterfly!" I pointed randomly. Surprisingly enough, there was a very pretty blue butterfly fluttering by. (A/N: That rhymed...that's kinda creepy.)

"What? Where?" Hashirama's head came up suddenly, and he began chasing after the butterfly. "Come back here, you pretty little thing!"

"That sounded so wrong," I commented, "even if it was to a butterfly. Actually, that sort of makes it even more wrong. Do you think he'll ever say that to a girl?"

"Not in the way most men would mean it. He'd probably do it in all sincerity."

"And when he does, it would probably be in the middle of a street, around a bunch of people, including children, and then he'd be smacked around by any mother that was around." We both pictured this in our minds. "His future looks bleak. I wish you luck on being his friend in a public setting."

We stood there and watched Hashirama in silence.

"So, Mada-kun, you're good at fighting, right?"

"Of course."

"So, you'll help me learn how to fight so I can survive on my own, right?"

"Like you could survive any training I put you through," Madara scoffed.

"Of course, the alternative would be an early death for me, and-"

"Wait, what? Why are you talking about dying, Shiro-kun? You can't die! You just got here!" Hashirama suddenly popped up in front of us. "You're not dying if I can help it! Madara, we will train Shiro-kun so that he will be able to defend himself. Actually, he'll be our first joint student! And we'll make him the best shinobi, ever!" Hashirama declared with determination.

"So you'll teach him your clan techniques?"

"Well, if he can do it, then yes!" I was a bit astounded at the trust he put in me. After all, I had met him less than an hour ago.

Madara sighed. "Fine. But we need to teach him the basics first. And I'll be in charge of his physical training."

"Alright! Well then, Shiro-kun, let's get started."

And from the gleam in Madara's eyes, I knew I was in for a training regimen from hell.

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**Please write reviews. Ask questions. If you have a suggestion for a pairing, write a review for it. Enjoy life! ~VM**


	3. Ch03: Training, Start!

**As promised, here is a new chapter! But first, some answers to a couple of your questions.  
1\. I'm going to guess that Hashirama and Madara are around eleven or twelve currently. I haven't been able to recreate my story timeline yet.  
2\. Any pairings? Probably not. You'll find out why as I continue writing.  
3\. Finding out my OC's true gender? Probably won't happen for a bit.  
****So, without further ado, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Naruto/Naruto Shippuden.**

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**Chapter 3: Training, Start!**

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_A little recap: Female OC, currently named Shiro, is in the body of a three-year-old, and meets Hashirama and Madara, who agree to train her. The two boys believe Shiro to be a boy._

**OC(Shiro)'s POV**

Even if the two were hellish instructors, Madara and Hashirama cared enough to teach me to survive in the wild. I was constantly moving, being instructed (_forced_) to do various ridiculous feats of physical endurance. It basically involved a lot of stretching, running back and forth, learning to climb trees, doing a lot of push-ups and sit-ups, and dodging sharp and pointy stuff. They also taught me what was safe to eat in the vicinity of the stream.

During my breaks, I had to learn to make my own shelter, the two boys instructing me on what to do.

"So, every night, make sure to do these exercises so you're not sore the next day," Hashirama told me, tossing me some cylindrical thing that I barely caught, my muscles screaming in protest at the fast movement.

I looked blankly at the scroll in my hands, staring at the unfamiliar squiggles. _When did he get a chance to write this? And what language is this, anyway?_

"Um… Hashi-chan?"

"Is it too much for you?" Madara asked with barely concealed contempt, his glare showing me exactly what he thought of me. _Yup, he thinks I'm a piece of trash._

I shook my head, feeling nervous about having to admit my illiteracy. "I don't know what it says," I said, pointing at the writing.

Hashirama and Madara exchanged a glance (_they think I'm an idiot_) before Hashirama announced enthusiastically, "That's alright, Shiro-kun. We'll teach you!"

But once again, Madara had this unholy gleam in his eye. I slowly inched away from the raven-haired boy. _Where did I manage to find such a sadist for a teacher? Oh yeah, he was a package deal that came with Hashirama._

"But I thought you both had to leave now. Could you tell me what I'm supposed to do, and I'll try to remember as much as I can?" The hopeful tone in my voice was certainly there, even if it was layered with exhaustion. _There is no way I'm staying sore for the entirety of the next sixteen hours._

"Alright, but tomorrow, we're going to give you an assessment," Madara announced, that glint in his eyes attempting to put fear in me. Too bad I was too exhausted to care anymore.

And so the two left me with a verbally listed homework assignment of exercise, instructions on going to bed at a reasonable time, and promises of meeting up the next day.

After stretching a lot in an attempt to relax, and following their instructions for mediation, I finally collapsed into my makeshift bed of branches and leaves. _Too. Tired. To. Think. ZZZzzzzz…_

The next morning, I was woken by soreness and pain all over my body. _Owww, my arms! My legs! My neck! My back! Ah, I didn't even know there were muscles there!_ I forced myself to roll over with a groan and began to move around to work my muscles. Once I'd deemed my body to be warm enough (I had to ignore the tiny sting of hunger coming from my stomach), I gave another groan and began the long list of stretches and exercises the two boys had given me to do. Needless to say, the pain felt more bearable afterwards.

"Shiro-kun!"

"GAH!" I jumped in surprise, my heart pounding like crazy, and spun around. There was Hashirama with his bowl-cut, smiling innocently at me. "Hashi-chan! Please don't do that. You almost made me have a heart attack!" _Where the heck had he popped up from?_

"You don't look very sore, Shiro-kun," he noted, completely ignoring my request, that smile still on his face.

"I stretched. A lot. Like you and Mada-kun said to. Look, I'm like a noodle." I wiggled my arms like some strange tentacle monster to emphasize my point. It didn't work too well, though, with my body being that of a three-year-old. My arms were too short and stubby to look fluid.

"Great! Since I'm here early, I'll teach you how to read and write," Hashirama announced, grabbing me by the arm and dragging me over to a large rock that overlooked the stream. He pulled out a scroll and began teaching me to read and write the local language. _Wait, how can I even understand what he and Madara say? There's no way it's English!_

And so a few hours of forcing my brain to comprehend scribbles into language passed.

I felt my stomach rumble. Oh, man, I completely forgot about breakfast!

And that's when Madara chose to show up, a smirk on his face and a glint in his eyes, looking perfectly ready for another day of torture.

_Why me?!_

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**'Why me?' indeed. Please review and be sure to check out my profile for my Facebook and Twitter account names, if you're interested in following me via social media. Also, if you would like to beta ANY of my fics, let me know, please. Thanks! ~VM**


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